A 'Virtual' Tour...
Just in case some of you myopic patrons need a bit more than a nod or a wink to find your way around, we have two alternatives. 1] You can peruse through the slides below, or 2] You can hit the green button below, and try and get someone from the OFJ office on the blower. Either way, it's a delightful prospect...Kinda.
News
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JANUARY 1, 2025
Many Thanks For The Revolution
Allow Me To Start 2025 Out With A Quick But Earnest "Thank You" To All The Gay Men Out There Who Are, And Always Have Been Unquestionably Better Looking Than I Am. My Wife And I Just Celebrated Our Many Years Of Marriage (If I Actually Knew The Exact Number, I Would Tell You). And She Is Undoubtedly A Woman With Which I Would Have Never Had A Shot At All, Were It Not For The Fact That Nearly All Of The Other Eligible Bachelors In Our Circle Of Friends Are Either Fully Vested Members Of The Homosexual Community, Or At Least Patrons At The Fundraisers. So I Want To Extend My Gratitude (Pardon The Imagery) To Every Last One Of You By Hugging You All In A Purely Platonic, But Nevertheless Extremely Heartfelt Manner. I Shall Take All That Good Feeling Into The Studio With Me, As I Attempt To Put Together Something That Resembles A Song Or Two That Someone Might Actually Want To Listen To More Than Once. Wash For At Least 20 Seconds. Rinse. Repeat :)-SZ
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MAY 1, 2025
And Ladies And Gentlemen..That Foot Is Me
Sometimes One Of The Biggest Lessons We All Learn Is How Alone We Really Are. Throughout My Entire Musical Production Journey, I Have Struggled With, And Have Coveted, The Idea Of Being Part Of/Having Some Sort Of A Production Team. Let's Face It, We All Have Our Strengths And Weaknesses. And There Are Specific Jobs We Can All Do In Record Time (No Pun Intended). At The Same Time, Others Can Find The Same Tasks So Overwhelming That It Seems Like The Rest Of Eternity Will Not Suffice. The Only Consolation I Seem To Be Able To Come Up With For This, Is That Maybe If We Merely Commit (If Not 100 Percent, Then Somewhere Close) To Learning/Accomplishing It By Ourselves...Then We Are Exponentially Stronger By Doing So. Oh, And Those Of Us Obsessive Types Who Virtually Hate The Chaotic Mess That Often Is The Practice Of Exploration? Well If Lewis And Clark Had Flown The Redeye To Seattle, They Never Would've Discovered The Rocky Mountains. Sorry…I'm Too Weak From Concentrating On Gain Staging/And Frequency Dependent Compression To Come Up With Anything Better Than That Right Now. One Tiny Baby Step For Me..One Giant Baby :)-SZ
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September 1, 2025
Kau Tau, Kung Pao, And Udder Such Disasters
We Are So Lost In This Country. Take The Ozone Layer, It's Probably Leaving Anyway (Rimshot). In This Era Of Global Warming, The Cliché "Can't See The Forest For The Trees" Takes On A Whole New Meaning. Actually, Fossil Fuel Isn't The Real Cause Of Our "Crisis" Anyway… Animal Gas Is . TruDat G. The Real Reason We Don't See Any Trees At All, Is A Thick Cloud Of Barnyard Flatulence. Yes, I Am On The Real..100..Serious. The Show Tunes Flying Out Of The South Side Of A Northbound Holstein, Cause Far More Harm To Our Planet Than Automobile Emissions. So I Say… Before We All Get Naked With A Fuel Cell, We Need To Fight This "Epidemic" From The Bottom Up (Ahem). And Yes, I Mean An Engine That Actually Runs On Freshly Cut Cheese. Oh The Possibilities. Forget A Chicken In Every Pot, Try A Siphon In The Business End Of Every Beauvine. Now, It's True…Cooking With Gas May Become Less Popular, But That Is Exactly What Some Left Leaning Constituents Would Like Us To Do Anyway. Well… That, And We Apparently All Need To Listen To Pasty European Teenagers When They Whine About "Climate Change". Incidentally, Cooking With Gas Is Not Completely Where I Am At Production-Wise, But I Will Be Cranking Up The Song Hot Plate Soon. Let's Just Hope The Recipe Doesn't Suck. Eat Making - After Beat Making :) SZ
Mixing
Without having to pick out a hand blender. The practice of mixing takes years of experience, or at least a six minute YouTube video.
Voiceovers
The greatest narrators in the industry started the same way. Just not with OFJ, and not with my grandma's headgear.
Podcasting
It's the fastest growing marketing vehicle. But it needs professional experts supervising the production. And then, only if half of the cast is wearing Spanx.